January 5, 2009

New Years Resolutions

New Years Resolutions

The Holiday Season has come and gone. The sugar high is disappearing, and we are realizing all our misdeeds. This brings us to our New Years resolutions. No wonder January is so depressing. If you can't keep a promise to yourself, then who can you keep a promise to? Oh, the dilemma.

Every year I look at all the things that I need to change and I know that I can not do it all. So, I choose not to do any of it. Oh, I write things down because that is what we are suppose to do, but I know that I am not going to make it past the first week, if I start at all. Then I realize that I have just created one more bad habit. Oh, what a vicious cycle.
Well, this year I want to change something. I am not going to focus on the things that I normally do. I want to do something a little different. This year I want to stop running. I am tired of running. I think that I have used up more energy running. I have wasted years of my life running, and running, and running. And what do I have to show for it. I have created more stress for my family, my friends, and myself. I have suffered unnecessarily mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. My running has done nothing to improve my life. I have exhausted myself beyond comprehension, and I have gotten nowhere.
So, I am going to stop running. I am going to stop running from responsibilities. I am going to stop running from my problems. I am going to stop running from the truth. I am going to stop running from my blessings.
I have a favorite thought by Marianne Williamson that goes like this:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
"Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure..."
The power we have is not in ourselves alone, but when we take upon the name of Christ we can do all things, that is where our power lies. This is our greatest fear and our greatest strength. Our fear is giving up control of our life, yet through Christ we find greater control in our life. Faith to give up what we know for what we do not know is scary, but the less we fight, the easier it is.
Running away from things you can't outrun is futile. You can run and run but it takes more energy. When if you had just given in you would have found that the source of your energy is in those things which you were running from. Turn and face your fears and you will not only help yourself but everybody around you.

So, this is my resolve this year. I am giving up. I am going to stop running, and accept what God has given to me as a gift. This year I will not hide my gift, but I will unwrap it and share it.